I love you my baby!

well its been a few weeks so i figured i would update! dont want the blog to get too rusty! ive had 3 sonnogram appointments since finding out we have a miracle growing and they have all been amazing! our first one at 6 weeks was just a little blob with a flicker but one of the most amazing sights weve seen in a loooong time! everything measured right on track but for some reason it was hard to believe it was real! i havent been sick besides my metformin im on that has made me queezy since i first started taking it two years ago....

the second one was at about 7 1/2 weeks and i had that one in san antonio! we werent planning on going back there but i ended up getting to go with all the girls from work to a hair show so i figured since i was going to be there, why not!? that one i had quite the audience! since chadd wasnt able to go, i took tayler with me, tanners girlfriend that i work with, then the rest of the girls tagged along! i was really glad they all got to see it since almost all of them have been going through this with me from day one! everything looked good  there as well and my fertility doctor set up the dates to start weening me off my medications! pretty scary but comforting at the same time knowing he's confident enough to start the process!

our third one was just yesterday and by far the best yet! the baby is growing wonderfully and we got to hear the heartbeat for the first time together! it was nice and strong and the baby was wiggling all around! just hoping its not a sign that it will have too much of chadds ADD! my husband cant sit still to save his life unless its in a recliner! but thats ok im not complaining!!! we are so in love with this baby already and are still praying hard that we get to meet him or her in about 7 months!!! the heart rate was at 188bpm which was perfect! after watching the baby wiggle around for a little bit, our tech then surprised us with a 3D view!!! i had to ask if it was our baby we were looking at or just an example image! haha! it was shocking! we were able to see its limbs developing as well as the face! you could see where the nose and eyes were starting to develop! it was the coolest thing ever to see an 8 1/2 week old baby so clearly!

my next appointment is this coming monday and my mom is going to come with me this time! since everything is looking good we dont want chadd to miss too much work time although i know he will have a hard time missing it! like ive said in the past, chadd has been amazing through everything weve been through. its not easy seeing your wife being poked and prodded as much as i have been just to try to MAYBE have a baby! he has definitely continued his greatness since we found out! he has done laundry, cooked dinner, cleaned the house, and the list goes on! he has truly given me the strength ive needed in these past 4 years and i know he will continue to be my rock for the rest of our lives! i know i wouldnt have made it this far if i didnt have such an amazing husband to create a child for. he is going to be an amazing father and i cant wait for the both of us to meet our child for the first time!!! Thank you God for this miracle and thank you to everyone for the continued prayers! they have truly helped us i know it! i can feel the miracle inside me thriving off prayer!!!


HERE IS OUR MIRACLE! THE PICTURE OF COURSE ISNT AS CLEAR AS SEEING IT ON THE SCREEN BUT ITS PRETTY GOOD!

THE LOVE OF MY LIFE AND THE REASON I'VE GONE THROUGH HELL AND BACK TO CREATE A CHILD FOR US!

This is dedicated to our parents

well its been a while! this ride has been anything but easy, but were so happy to finally get to enjoy the ride!!! two full invitro cycles, 500 trips to san antonio, countless needles into my body, pills, bedrest, financial support from family and an amazing set of friends(you know who you are), and $30,000 later we saw the heart beat yesterday of our growing miracle and wouldnt trade it for anything in the world!

chadd and i have an amazing marriage. weve always had a strong relationship since we were first together and i have to contribute a lot of it to him. he has definitely given me the strength ive needed to get to where we are today. he and i have definitely changed eachother over the past 13 years together, and i know it will only get better. he has helped me overcome the fear of the future by reminding me to take all of this one step at a time, and i have just about broken his fear of needles with all the shots he has given to me! im by no means saying that the love we have for our child is any different than someone that got pregnant the "easy way," but going through all of this has definitely made us appreciate Gods work. trust me, if you dig down deep and have seen what weve seen about the process of what goes into making a baby, you would be shocked at how many miracles are created so easily sometimes!

i honestly have to say as well that our marriage has been amazingly supported by watching the love and support our parents have always given eachother. not everyone is fortunate enough to witness such love and devotion, but we truly have been. not only the love they have for eachother, but the love they have for us, their children. when our first IVF cycle failed, it was like our world was over. the road had ended, but for some reason all of a sudden, i didnt want it to end. i thought i was tired of the countless san antonio trips, shots, and pills, but i knew deep down God had a plan and in that instant i knew we couldnt give up yet. thankfully for our amazing parents, they all came together and put up the money we needed to try one more time. at first we both thought, no way...theirs no way we can take money like that from them, but then my mom said, "hey we want to be grandparents just as bad as yall want to be parents and wouldnt you do the same for your children if they needed it and you could?" so of course their was no turning it down after that! so from their hearts and wallets to ours, the money appeared, but what dissapeared was our fear...the first time we went through all of this, i told chadd afterward that in my heart something didnt feel right but of course i ignored it. for some reason though, all of us had this feeling that it was just going to work this time. we werent hesitant, we werent afraid, we werent nervous for some reason! i know now that it was all God working inside of us to ease our hearts so we would know that the future was in His hands and if we just trusted Him, it would all work!
we also have a huge place in our hearts for all of the people that have come out of the wood work lifting us up to Him in prayer. Ive met quite a few people recently that have friends of friends that know us and have spoken about us, then they come to us saying that, even though they dont know us, they are praying for us. people have added us to their prayer groups at their churches and dont even know our last names! its amazing! i feel really strongly as well that all of these prayers have helped to heal our hearts and keep the confidence and strength in them that we have needed. so from the bottom of mine and chadds hearts, you know who you are, we cant thank you enough for the amazing prayers. we know we go to bed at night lifted into the arms of God because of all of you.

thank you to everyone for helping us get here. you will all be a part of creating our miracle! please continue the prayers and we cant wait for everyone to meet the miracle you all helped create this coming April!

I LOVE YOU MY CHADD